Thirty-two years ago we walked into a new church with a lot of baggage. We settled into a pew, which we quickly learned “belonged” to someone else when a little bald man looked me straight in the eye and grunted, “you’re sitting in my seat.” When we scooted down and he didn’t move we translated what he said to mean, “you’re sitting in my pew.” Fortunately, instead of getting our feelings hurt we chose another seat, because after the service the bald man introduced himself and gave me his business card. His name was Bennie and he was a “Jack of all trades.” While I didn’t need his services, I kept his card because a quote on the back really struck a chord with me. It said: “Animosity is the acid that destroys from within the container in which it is stored.”

I believe it was a Divine appointment that day, as I was becoming so bitter and had no idea that it was destroying me and my relationships. Until I read that quote. I had to admit that my unforgiveness was hurting me. You may have heard the saying, “Unforgiveness is like drinking poison, hoping the other person dies.” I felt the position of unforgiveness eating away at me and erupting on innocent bystanders. I knew I needed to get help cutting away the root of bitterness.

Fortunately, our small group leader had experience with 12-steps and helped me see that the animosity growing in my gut was from unresolved unforgiveness. While I had easily convinced myself that I had forgiven those that had harmed me, the reality is that I really had no idea of what I had forgiven. Blanket forgiveness makes as much sense as forgiving a financial debt without knowing how much the person really owes.

Through creating an inventory of my hurts I was able to work through the inventory, forgiving each debt one by one. Forgiveness is the antidote to anger, which left to fester, grows a bitter root. If animosity is eating away at you, I encourage you to check out or Celebrate Recovery group which meets on Fridays at 7:00 pm. You’ll find leaders who will listen and guide you through the same process that helped me 32 years ago.

Click here to find out more about Celebrate Recovery.